So, I REALLY want to stop functioning. Like, REALLY!!!! I want to quit this job and say “Fuck the world”. The only thing that keeps me from doing it, and I know this is pansy-ish (or is this what holds everyone together?) is that I don’t want to move!!!! I really love where I live, it’s a somewhat posh house, very expensive rent, and no job=no house. I can’t bullshit my way around and say “I’ll make the money some other way – I won’t. It’s a lot of money. God DAMN this fucking capitalism and all its little claws that keep you sucked in! I swear to GOD I will throw it all out and buy me an RV and just drive around this fucking country!!! But there again….I worry….without the moorings…the familiarity of home and family…will I be ok? Or will I just be fucking myself over? Oh dear Lord is this just the ranting of a crazy bipolar woman? I don’t know.