Psychiatry Appointment #3 – Postscript

Well I hate to add something to a post when I think it’s “done” but I forgot something pretty significant!  The doctor told me that I need to kick the marijuana habit!!!!!!!!!!  Oh Lordy-Jeezy this is gonna be a hard one.  The reason is, he says the Wellbutrin is a big honkin’ dose of depression for me, and then he said adding the marijuana, which is so much more powerful than it used to be, especially here in Colorado where it’s legal and they’ve refined it and got it down to a science, is like adding a second dose of depression to my brain.  FUCK!!!  I have been using the Sativa strains (Sativa=speed, revs you up) to help with my ADD symptoms during the day with mixed results, but sometimes it really helps with my focus and I can totally kick ass.  I also use Sativa when I exercise and walk for miles & miles.  At other times it just spaces me the fuck out.  At night I use Indica (knocks you the fuck out, what you usually think of a stoner, sinking into the couch) as a kind of reward for getting through the day and it helps me sleep.  I know at this point it’s really no different than being an alcoholic and drinking yourself into oblivion, I am stoning into oblivion, except there’s no hangover.  This is going to be really, really hard to kick.  Oh fucking twelve-step programs, I don’t want you!!!!!!!!!!!  I might need one.  Fuck!!!!!   Yes people I tell you all truth.  Ok I’m off to start my day and mull this over.  Peach out, homies!

12 thoughts on “Psychiatry Appointment #3 – Postscript

  1. It’s hard to do, but better to cut down on it and then get off it so that you don’t need it on a regular basis– the psychoactive drugs don’t mix well, and there’s a condition called tardive dyskinesia that’s a result of drugs/alcohol + psychopharm meds that is UGLY and horrible to have to suffer through. Fingers crossed for you.

  2. Let us know how you get one with this new challenge. I have never been able to use marijuana or drink alcohol with successful outcomes. I am the stereotypical one sniff of a bottle cap and I am anyones. I go manic after that initial drink,and I can be found on hands and knees picking fluff off someones carpet at a party …not a good look. Marijuana I tried once and I tried to jump out of a moving car.That was a good reason to never try it again for me. I can imagine how hard it is going to be for you right now. for me it would be like saying you can’t have your daily chocolate fix.

  3. Yeah, I’ve had a couple docs tell me that. I even went dry for quite awhile. All it did was promote insomnia. Getting mood swings under better control with Rx’s helped so I didn’t feel like I needed Mary to get by.

    But I’m a bad example and will continue to be. My current doc, therapist, and I all agree that it’s not a problem so long as I’m not self-medicating myself into a stupor. For me, smoking a little marijuana seems to be better than additional prescriptions for anxiety and insomnia and severe pain. Effective, fewer/lower intensity side effects than Rx’s, makes it easier to avoid alcohol, etc.

    There are basically no scientific studies (at least that I have ever been able to find) that have any findings of merit on the topic of marijuana as a mood stabilizer or how marijuana interacts with bipolar or how marijuana interacts with any prescription medication or pretty much anything related. Given the lack of solid scientific findings, I’m going with my evidence-based approach for now. 😉

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