Well I had therapy today. I’ve been seeing this therapist since the beginning of December. I’m thinking it’s about damn time I stopped crying. That’s what I think. It’s not what I do. I pretty much walk in there, sit down, and start crying. She doesn’t even get to say “How are you?”. Sorry Dr. Awesome.
Today’s tears came courtesy of some shitty-ass quiz I took online called “Are you bipolar?” and it asked all sorts of questions like “Do you have mystical experiences” and “Do you find yourself singing?” and “Do you see synchronicities?”, all kinds of shit like that. Basically, things that I really treasure in myself and in life, this quiz was chalking it all up to the disease of bipolar. It really kind of devastated me! Well I talked it over with Dr. Awesome and she called major bullshit on that fucking quiz. THAT made me feel better!
I’ve really had a lot of shit rattling around in my head, like, am I delusional when it comes to money? I want to believe that something will happen that will relieve me of the need to work. I just can’t stomach the idea of doing the same shit for another twenty years! So, I make up stories in my head about how my circumstances might dramatically change. Dr. Awesome says that she thinks a lot of people do this, and that my circumstances might in fact actually improve, so this isn’t a total load of crap. I don’t know. The truth is in there somewhere!
I forgot to talk about my newly minted stress-surfing theory, oh well. Dang! I wish I could hire Dr. Awesome just to have some interesting conversations with. I like to analyze the fuck out of everything. She could help.
Well that’s about all the news that’s not fit to print, I guess I will wrap up the Bipolar On Fire news hour with a firm PEACH OUT and WORD TO YER MAMA!