There’s something about living in the stream of life – it can get pretty busy. I don’t like being busy! Yet, I don’t like sitting around the house. At least, I don’t now. Something has changed. A switch has been flipped. Where before, I was just sitting and thinking about what I could be doing, or should be doing, I am now doing. What is it? Is it the magic little pills? Lamictal? Oxcarbazapine? Is it Spring? Can I save it for Winter? Or better, what I really want to know, can I control it? It is such a relief to be back in the participating level of life, I don’t want to move away from it. Every year, I look back on the Winter, and say “That was the worst winter, ever!” Well, they can’t ALL be the worst winters, can they? Is it just a loss of perspective? Maybe it’s the massive loss of functioning. And the loss of outdoor life! I depend on living my life outdoors! That is why I need to move somewhere where I can live outdoors year-round. Oh Lordy I need to make that happen!!
This weekend is my mom & dad’s 50th Wedding Anniversary. Wow talk about rising to an occasion. I have to summon up a whole lot of functioning to read at their Anniversary Mass, then there’s this great big party, and all six of us kids have to be in a receiving line for the guests and introduce ourselves. Can I be stoned for this? I wonder if I’ll forget my name. It’s a lot for me. I will have to go minute by minute or I will get totally overwhelmed. At least this is a long weekend, so I’ll get a break after Saturday to putz in the garden, which is finally planted (!!) including flowers in the pots and drip system functioning. Now I just wait for things to grow. And pull weeds
I am curious to hear from others how you manage your high and low functioning times, and how you manage social situations. I’ve been out of the social scene for so long, I almost forget how to small-talk. I was never good at it to begin with. Now I am just plain tongue-tied. Oh, and it’s already Hump Day!! Hump On, people!!