Well I think it’s safe to say that Hormone Replacement Therapy is saving my life. I was really on the knife’s edge there for a couple of months and I was planning on doing ECT after I finishing moving houses at the end of this month, and as a last-ditch effort I went to the doctor and got on these hormones. What a difference!!! I am a new person. I’m back to my old self!! New, old, you get what I mean! I’m functioning! No more dread when I wake up in the morning. No suicidal thoughts or ideations. No wishing the other cars would crash into me on the road. No crying jags. It’s a revelation!!!! I have energy and I’m able to go-go-go (not in a manic way but I am able to work on this move in a functional way). I am so grateful to my sister, who found the doctor and pushed me to make the appointment right away.
I just can’t believe that HORMONES pushed me to the edge like this. Well in a way I can, because before menopause I used to have PMS that would make me suicidal about every other month. This is some really extraordinary shit. I wonder if doctors are studying the effect of hormones on mental health? I mean REALLY? Because I *almost* went there! Oh Lordy Jeezy I am just glad to be back. Thank you to so many supportive people! Peach out homies!