Happy Fucking Thanksgiving!

I just about PUKED on all the good will towards (wo)men and love and thanksgiving that was flowing all over social media today.  C’mon people, where’s the hate?  Where’s the bigotry?  Hypocrisy?  You actually gave it up for a day?

Well my family did NOT put the “fun” in dysfunction today.  It was an ordeal to be endured and frankly I am not down with that shit.  Why I didn’t bring some of the good shit with me is just beyond me.  I am an asshole, I guess.  My Dad, true to form, yelled his head off at my Aunt (my Mom’s sister) because he is five years old (not 82) and doesn’t want to share my Mom.  I, being a mature adult, did not punch my Dad’s 82 year old face in, although it was definitely my first choice.  Instead, since I am also a five year old, I packed up my toys and left with a dismissive “Bye Bitch” (really just Bye but I like the sound of Bye Bitch oh so much more).  If you could only see what goes on inside me when my Dad yells, it’s like Satan lights the fires of hell in me and I want to scream and yell and hit something.  Doing nothing like that is very unsatisfying.  Instead, I drive home and proceed to turn it inward by getting stoned as hell.  Solution!  Shitty, addictive solution but I’m working with the tools at hand and that’s what I’ve got.  I know, I know, I should stay away from the damn marijuana store.  Those fuckers lure me in with all of their delicious edibles and their different strains, their indicas and sativas and cbd’s and cbn’s and pain patches.  But all it does is get you stoned.  Nothing fancy.  I go back and forth with “am I going to be clean and sober” and “am I going to go ahead and be a real pothead”.  Right now I am leaning towards pothead.  But no drinking.  Except for tomorrow night.  Because I have a DATE!  With a REAL BOY!!!  Oh I say boy but hell he’s in his thirties.  He and I like to drink and smoke pot and talk a blue streak and, uh, other things.  You know.  Play tinker toys.  It’ll be fun.

I hope you had a satisfying day in some way.  If you didn’t, don’t feel bad.  It ain’t all rose-colored dildos out there.  There’s a lot of trash.  I had a bad day, so someone else didn’t have to.  That’s the way I see it.  Now for Christmas, I think I’m going to arrange to be gone.  I better think of an elaborate lie, starting right now.  Any ideas?  Hope your day was peachy.  Love, Bipolaronfire.  FIRE!!!!!

 

12 thoughts on “Happy Fucking Thanksgiving!

  1. All I can say, honey, is that I’m glad it’s over in 6.5 hours!!!!!!
    XOXO

    #IhateThanksgivingbecauseitsabunchofbullshit

    #cmondidyouseethelatestadvertisingcampaignTHANKSGETTINGwtf

  2. Just smoked a bowl myself and now I’m going to hide in my room.

    The holidays can eat shit imo. There’s no real love involved anymore if there ever was…from the sounds of it, I need to hide by you. I need a store, not one of the lucky states as of yet. :, (

  3. p.s. I’m sorry you also had a bad day. I’m super-sorry about your Dad becoming Satan.

    I was told by a very close relative that due to my 8-year-old daughter’s misplacing the dog’s leash, that meant that I’m not an organized person and that I
    “won’t get better until I’m organized.”

    I told her I AM better, I’m not getting better, and then I explained to her what that meant. (i.e. I’m stable, I’m not in the fucking looney bin again, I write regularly and I have a book deal, I’m a great mom, I have a clean dog, a clean house, my husband of 17 years doesn’t cheat on me like hers did – UGH, I went below the belt, oh well, etc. Fucccccccck. :(((((((((((

    Earlier in the day she also said that I should “cut down on the blogging and use that time to clean my home”, which is perfectly clean – I even hired professional cleaners last week to make sure the house was way better than usual.

    I got so upset from that crap + a whole lot more that for the first year ever, I didn’t even have pumpkin pie dessert, which I made complete with homemade crust & homemade organic whipped cream with vanilla bean paste.

    She apologized, but the damage was done. I’m sad, drained, angry and I despise the fact that Thanksgiving brings this kind of shit up even more than usual. 😦 Forgive me for venting and for being a bummer!!!!!

  4. yeah, it’s Verizon for “Thanksgetting” – that’s beyond disgusting, isn’t it??? I hate them so much for that, and unfortunately we signed a contract with them recently -dammit!!!

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