An Appointment With Dr. Flaky and FLOWERS!!

News Flash!  I am meeting with Dr. Flaky at 9:30 am tomorrow, Wednesday.  Not sure if she’s actually going to give me more work to do, as she says, or if she’s going to fire me.  She said she wants to pay me for what I’ve done so far,  and then give me more files.  I guess it could go either way.  In the meantime, I have nothinggggg to dooooooo.  Yesterday I planted flowers and herbs in my pots outside (YEAH!), one of my favorite things to do.  I keep going outside to look at them, they’re so fucking cute!!!  I made myself exercise first, then going to Home Depot for plants was my reward.  Today I will exercise, then go to Costco as my reward.   Not much of a reward but fuck!  I have to do something to make myself exercise!  I have gained back some of the weight I’d lost, which makes me mad as hell.  It’s due to being back on the sugar addiction, and yes it’s a fucking addiction to me, and not exercising every single day as I was.  I don’t know how I’m going to get off the sugar.  My sister said something interesting the other day, she is a PE and Health teacher and just went to a conference for the top PE Teachers in the country.  There was a talk on Eating Disorders, and she said that one of the overlooked Eating Disorders is Overeating.  Well goddamn.  I have an Eating Disorder.  It’s just that simple!  I have a terrible time controlling what I put in my mouth.  (Shush with your dirty minds!).  So I’m like, wondering, do I need to go to Overeaters Anonymous?  I think I should look into it.  Oh goodie.  Another 12-Step Program.  Well, I need to do SOMETHING because I fucking HATE being fat!!!!  When I look at pictures of myself over the years, my weight is all over the place.  Huge, svelte, and everything in between.  I sure am tired of struggling with this.  But I imagine that I will have to keep struggling if I want to achieve an ideal weight.

Well as usual this post is all over the place, as is my mind.  What the fuck, Adderall?  You’re not organizing my thoughts at all.  At least it enables me to work.  When I work, I seem to be able to concentrate and get things done.  When I have nothing to do…well I’m all over the place.  As you can see.

Whelp, it’s time to get back to my games!  Must! Achieve! 10,000 points!  Fuck, I gotta achieve SOMETHING today!!  Hope your week is going exceedingly well.  Peach out, homies!!

9 thoughts on “An Appointment With Dr. Flaky and FLOWERS!!

  1. Have you ever tried yoga? It’s like a drug for imbalanced people if you can get into it.

    On eating… I have heard of compulsive eating, probably related to overeating. I struggle with that sometimes, but I compensate with exercise, or at least try to. Tough stuff.

    I wish you health and more flowers. Oh well if your thoughts are all over the place. Keep ’em coming!

  2. I’m super impressed you’re still exercising, even if it is sporadically. It’s better than nothing. I grew up anorexic and since starting meds again and divorcing my husband(6years ago) I’ve packed on the pounds big time. Its a real mind fuck. I now classify myself as a binge eater. I went to Overeaters Anonymous once, then decided I’d prefer to use that time eating chocolate. I don’t underestimate the power of the sugar pull caused by meds. When on venlaflaxine I used to EAT IN MY SLEEP. Would wake up to a kitchen scattered with empty packets and crumbs all over the floor. In the beginning I thought I was being robbed by a hungry burglar. But no, like sleepwalking, I was sleep-eating. I googled it. Its a thing. Maybe you do it too but don’t know?

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s