Therapy Day, YAY!!

This is the first blog I’m writing on my Mac.  I’ve always been a pc person, but I have a Mac now too, and I’m trying to learn and adjust and not be so damn rigid and set in my ways.  Ya see?  You CAN teach an old dog new tricks!!  The old dog just needs to have a little willingness…

So here are the highlights of my life that I will regale my therapist with:  1.  Spider Trauma.  See my last post.  I’m still in hyper-alert mode and taking too much clonazepam to sleep.  2.  Dad trauma.  Do you fucking hate when you wake up in the morning to a group text saying “Dad is in the hospital emergency room . . .” — never happened to you?  Oh you just WAIT!  It has happened one too many times, and I’m sure it will happen some more, because Dad is old and weak and getting older and weaker.  This is a reality that is hard to deal with.  3.  Waking up to a text that my AUNT is in the hospital with chest pains (she has a heart condition).  Aunt is very narcissistic and, it turns out, has a very low threshold for pain.  ‘Twas not anything to do with her heart, but merely gastritis.  I kind of got a clue as to what a wimp she was to pain when they ripped the tape off to take her IV out, and she made horror-story faces like she was being stabbed.  AND she wouldn’t let the nurses discharge her until they looked at some pictures of her cats.  AND THEN she asked for the nurse’s phone number so she could call her and let her know how she was (I put the kibosh on that so the nurse didn’t have to say “Fuck no, lady!”)  4.  Work has wound down to sporadic calling in of prescriptions.  I can’t even pay my phone bill on this much work.  I took a long walk the other night and talked to God (not sure that God exists, but on the chance that s/he does, we had a chat).  What in the FUCK is going on?  Do you WANT me to go back to the work that I hate??  Do I have to hate life in order to live?  Can’t I have more work that I like?  SHOW ME A SIGN!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I’m sure God gets a lot of this “show me a sign” business and is probably fed up with it.  No signs thus far, and no work either.

Anyhoo, this fucking machine keeps autocorrecting my strange words, which is annoying. I won’t turn it off, though, because my many-times-fried brain gets stuck spelling long words and needs help.  Oh!  One more random fact, I got THREE HUNDRED BUCKS in Amazon gift cards for my birthday and am happily shopping away.  A bright spot!!!  Hope there’s a bright spot in your week too.  Toodles for now (almost autocorrected to Noodles, that would be stupid).  Hope you are well, friends!!!

9 thoughts on “Therapy Day, YAY!!

  1. I’ve been through the Dad trauma calls you mentioned & I know how hard that is! I’m sending you lots of love and strength as you’re faced with that & the Aunt ordeal.

    I won’t mention spiders after this line. (ahhhhhhhhhh!)

    I love my Mac and I hope you will too! ))))
    Have a blast with the Amazon gift cards, honey, you deserve it!
    XOXOXOOXOXOOXOOXOOXOXOXOOX

  2. Have fun shopping on Amazon! I got a $50 gift card for eBay & spent 2 days carefully selecting items I wanted. What therapy… In that it kept my mind occupied for 2 days!

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